I am blessed with a daughter. She is 5 years old and everything that I can hope for in a daughter.
Before she was born, I dreaded the thought of parenthood. It didn't help that I read about conditions like down syndrome and autism. My wife and I took a long time before deciding that we were mentally ready for parenthood. Now that I am a daddy, I am enjoying every moment of it. Whenever JJ learns something new, I am just ecstatic. There is so much joy being a daddy; and I long for another child. If we are blessed with a son, that would be even better!
About 3 years ago, my wife and I decided to try for another. But after months of trying, nothing happened. Then we went to a specialist doctor to seek help. I was made to go for a sperm-count test. It was an embarrassing procedure. I had to ejaculate into a small sterile container. Because I was embarrassed, I opted to do it at home first thing in the morning. But then after that I had to rush to the lab. Well, the count revealed that I had enough healthy sperms after all.
The next few months saw us husband and wife visiting the doctor frequently. We tried practically everything — my wife's menstrual cycle was closely monitored; we were given timetable for intercourse; some sort of "fertilizer" pills for my wife; this test and that test. After all of those embarrassment, we came to the conclusion that we are not meant to have another child.
That is why my heart ached when I read about the murder of a newborn baby boy (The Star - 20 Oct). Whatever the problem was, surely there were other ways to deal with it. Put him up for adoption; or even abandon him at a bus stop or something. Did the boy have to die for the sins of his parents?
Before she was born, I dreaded the thought of parenthood. It didn't help that I read about conditions like down syndrome and autism. My wife and I took a long time before deciding that we were mentally ready for parenthood. Now that I am a daddy, I am enjoying every moment of it. Whenever JJ learns something new, I am just ecstatic. There is so much joy being a daddy; and I long for another child. If we are blessed with a son, that would be even better!
About 3 years ago, my wife and I decided to try for another. But after months of trying, nothing happened. Then we went to a specialist doctor to seek help. I was made to go for a sperm-count test. It was an embarrassing procedure. I had to ejaculate into a small sterile container. Because I was embarrassed, I opted to do it at home first thing in the morning. But then after that I had to rush to the lab. Well, the count revealed that I had enough healthy sperms after all.
The next few months saw us husband and wife visiting the doctor frequently. We tried practically everything — my wife's menstrual cycle was closely monitored; we were given timetable for intercourse; some sort of "fertilizer" pills for my wife; this test and that test. After all of those embarrassment, we came to the conclusion that we are not meant to have another child.
That is why my heart ached when I read about the murder of a newborn baby boy (The Star - 20 Oct). Whatever the problem was, surely there were other ways to deal with it. Put him up for adoption; or even abandon him at a bus stop or something. Did the boy have to die for the sins of his parents?
4 comments:
it's Toastmasters Humorous Speech contest season now. For the past months I have been attending these contests either as official, judge, or some other roles. All in all I must have heard no less than 50/60 humorous speeches. The final of my Div was yesterday and the winner is heading to Medan in November to compete with other members from other countries. There was this contestant who spoke about getting a son after his first daughter. He didn't win but the way he told us the story and the things he had to do was really funny. He related how he consulted some Chinese doctor /method and was told it's 98% proven. And yes, he happened to be the 2% and got his money back. The 3rd time, he was so sure he was getting a boy after the scan. But he got another girl!
Like any good speech, his wasn't just ha ha ha funny but he had a message too. About loving all his daughters and how the make me so happy and all !
Hi CKoh,
I am having the same feeling about dreading parenthood. I feel I am not ready, there are still many things i dunno on handling children. e.g. Would i be a good parent, can I provide the best for my child. It's not to say I don't like children. In fact, I alwiz admire other ppl having kids and longing for one but alwiz feel I haven't reached the stage that I am really ready for this.
During my first year of marriage, I always worry that I may get pregnant (especially the few months I was jobless) Who would want to hire a pregnant lady. But at the same time, what if when the time comes I want a kid and i can't get one.
cheers,
Ju
ju, no one can ever be fully prepared for parenthood. it's a learning by doing thing.
My dear julie,
I have come to realise that we can very rarely be fully prepared for parenthood. As delurk has correctly pointed out, it's a learning-by-doing thing.
I can appreciate your fear of parenthood, as I went through the same ordeal. I took way too long to make up my mind -- until it's almost too late. But this is one instance where we can't rely on that famous phrase: "better late than never". Once you are "late", it will be "never"!
Bear in mind that we are all not immune from making mistakes; perhaps the best that we can hope for is to make as few as possible. Having said that, however, isn't making mistakes is one of the best ways of learning?
If you really intend to have kids some day, then you have a better shot at it when you are younger. Put "parental instinct" into the driver's seat, and you will be amazed at how parenthood can come so naturally!
Post a Comment