Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Piercer (18SX)

A young Canadian man suffered the misfortune of getting involved in a car accident which resulted in a serious injury to his spine. Although he survived the accident, he bacame paralysed from neck down. The doctors couldn't tell if he's ever gonna regain any control of his body. Only time could tell.

The next couple of weeks saw the young man spending his time in the hospital bed. Each day nurses would take turns to feed and bathe him. One day, an old lady nurse was bathing him when she noticed that the guy had a tattoo on his penis. Although the nurse pretended not to focus her attention on the tattoo, she was able to see the word "SWAN" on the penis.

Later on, during the break, the nurses gathered in the cafeteria; and as usual they started relating to each other their stories of the day. The old nurse told them about the paralysed young man and the strange tattoo on the penis—SWAN.

Then a young, beautiful and sexy nurse joined in the conversation.

"Oh! That's strange," she said, "yesterday, when it was my turn to bathe that man, I noticed that tattoo too. But what I saw was not SWAN. Instead, it was SASKATCHEWAN!"

Y'know, folks, it takes all sorts to make the world. Why would anyone put a tattoo on the penis anyway? Or why would anyone have tattoos anywhere on the body at all? I find it strange that this thing about tattoos is becoming fashionable again in KK. I am aware that within Gaya Street alone, we have 2 tattoo saloons.

Recently, during the Rotarian International Night dinner, there was this pretty teenage girl who sat beside me. She was an interactor from one of the schools in KK. While waiting for the progamme to start, I created small talks with her. She said she had an older brother—I believe about 21 years old. I asked her what's her brother doing. She said her brother was a Piercer.

A Piercer? What is a Piercer anyway!? Upon reaching home that night, I looked up for the word in my Oxford Dictionary. And as I had expected, it was no where to be found! Perhaps it's time that I buy myself the latest version of the Oxford.

As it turned out, a Piercer is the name given to a person whose profession is—well—to pierce people's bodies. Piercing bodies is actually a profession! So what else does a Piercer do? Well, they also do tattoos. It is an art, really. Who knows, one of these days, if I lose my job, I might be able to use my imagination and creativity in doing tattoos.

But I sure as hell am not gonna do any LIVELY CHAMP on my penis—even if all those letters can fit there! I can't bear the thought of when and if I end up paralysed in a hospital bed, an old nurse is gonna see the word LIMP on my penis.


Anonymous said...

bro, what are you doing sitting beside the PYT? tying to be a lively champ?

Cornelius said...

Nah... delurk, that wasn't my choice. Honest!

I happen to be the Student Advisor for St Franciscan Interactors. To be quite honest, I don't even know why they need an advisor—they never seem to need our advice anyway. Well, it was kinda free sitting that night, and I was in an animated conversation with my fellow rotarian when President James walked in with the St Franciscan Interactor, and suggested that she sit beside me. It's one of those very, very rare moments in my life that I get the momentary pleasure of the company of a young pretty girl!... hehehe

It is interesting to try to fathom the young minds, you know. Mind you, not easy to understand how a young girl thinks, let alone women in general.

It didn't occur to me to ask her, but I didn't think I qualified as a lively champ to her!... Uncle just too boring I guess... hehehe

CK said...

haha... they need the money that you will sponsor as adviser, tat's the real function of the adviser. rich pp's duty corny!!!!

but ur post is funny.

Cornelius said...

Yeah, CK, I suppose a mind like yours wouldn't fail to get the joke!... hahaha!

It's just one of those moments I reveal the comedian in me. There are plenty more where that came from, but y'know, some people don't have the heart for them!

Recently, someone told me that a treasure hunter I know was afraid to talk to me because I appeared too serious.

Serious !? Is she for real? Well, if only she knew the real me!

CK said...

who's tat hunter? afraid of you? hmm....

wei...by the way, wat do u mean by "a mind like yours"???

Anonymous said...

I can't help laughing when reading this posting. Hilarious! Tsk tsk...naughty. ;)

Cornelius said...

No worries, CK, she's been assured that I'm not such a scary guy after all. We are good friends now! In fact, the next time I do an unofficial hunt, she said she'll help me find some sponsors!

"A mind like yours" means twisted mind lah, what else!

Hey why don't your team seriously consider clerking a hunt? Tell Leslie and Teo to start working on it. There is always a first time for everything!

Cornelius said...

Oh! You get it too, claire dear!?

Ummm... are you sure you are old enough to read this particular posting? It's rated 18SX, mind!

Well, at least there is one organ of his which's still functioning well. Not too sure about whether he's able to control that organ though...MUAHAHAHA!

Oh! how da hell did I come up with all these nonsense!? Oh boy, I'm gonna faint from laughter!

CK said...

y silent these days?
no more piercer stories?

Cornelius said...

Been catching up with my life during the long holidays—went to the movies, i.e. 10,000 B.C, Spiderwick Chronicles, and The Empress and The Warriors.

Also went around to build up on my treasure hunt question bank. I'd like to be prepared. The "masterpiece" queations require a little bit more time to conjure up. Then when there is a need to organise a hunt, I just need to fill up the gaps with the easier questions which can be done quickly.

Then been reading other blogs and playing online sudoku in between.

Just a few days mah. So fast missing my posts already ah?... hehehe