The Head vs The Hate

I read with great interest the case of a caregiver in a childcare centre who was caught on CCTV abusing a 4-year-old boy [New Straits Times]. Apparently, the video clip of that incident had gone viral, but I find it strange that nobody had shared it with me yet. Perhaps that's because my friends knew that I would very rarely entertain video clips shared by friends. Although I did not see the video clip of the abuse, I can imagine what had happened based on the news article.

Then while checking out facebook last night, I stumbled upon video clips shared by some friends - this time of the parents of the boy at the childcare centre beating up the caregiver. This was apparently after they had discovered the identity of the person who abused their son, and then beating her up in retaliation. What's interesting to note was that the vast majority of those who commented on that post supported the aggression of the parents.

This reminds me of an old movie entitled Seven, starring Brat Pitt and Morgan Freeman.

That movie had nothing to do with child abuse, of course, but it demonstrated how a man in the profession of upholding the law can suddenly act against the law because of the hate in his heart. It's a very powerful movie to me, not just because it reflected how we humans have the tendency to act with the hate instead of with the head, when provoked, but also because at the end of that movie, I found myself saying that if I were in his shoes I might have done exactly the same thing!

In the same way, I find it a little disturbing that although what the parents did to the caregiver was legally wrong, I can totally understand why they did it. Again, what's even scarier is that if I were in their shoes, I might have done exactly the same thing! 

It takes a strong person to accept the reality that they are many bad people out there, but it takes an even stronger person not to become bad himself in retaliation to the wrongful act by others. On most days we can all be morally principled, calm and collected, and we will behave in a civilized manner. But there will be the last straw that breaks the camel's back, when all hell breaks loose. Every one has his limit to patience and calmness.

I can totally understand why the parents did what they did, but it's still legally wrong to act in such a manner. It is very easy for me to comment from the sideline that they shouldn't have done what they did. But if I were the father of the child, it's entirely possible that the caregiver may be bed-ridden in the intensive care unit right now. Therefore, I shall carefully refrain from saying what the parents should or should not have done. This whole incident is just an unfortunate event that could bring about either the best or the worst in a good person.