tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8760307254603261893.post3843112232747231160..comments2023-07-30T21:23:49.509+08:00Comments on Because I say so...: Safety Nets Of The RunnerCorneliushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08049388322332876859noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8760307254603261893.post-48725752786991653542012-12-25T19:15:07.726+08:002012-12-25T19:15:07.726+08:00Thanks, KD and Juin Yi Ng, for your comments. We h...Thanks, KD and Juin Yi Ng, for your comments. We have had a bit of other comments on facebook too regarding this topic.<br /><br />There are slight variations in the responses, but I think it generally boils down to a peculiar fear of failure in meeting expectations - both of others as well as of oneself.<br /><br />There was once a long spell when I kept trying and and kept failing to run the half marathon in under 2 hours. It was frustrating to say the least, but it was also <i>embarrassing</i>. It took me quite a while to figure out how to break the sub-2hour barrier; it seemed almost impossible for me! I can still remember how my running buddy, Dr Peter, who knew my ability, remarked when I failed yet again after several attempts. He said something like "Can't be!" Exactly the same two words that I said to myself!<br /><br />It's not really a case of wanting so much to live up to people's expectation, but I'm doing all this mainly for myself! But that is not to say others have no effect on me! In the end, there is that strange pathetic craving for recognition of one's achievement too!<br /><br />Ultimately, there can never been an end when it comes to what people think of our achievements. Some of them will undoubtedly admire us for conquering the 10km, half marathon, full marathon, 100km ultra marathon. Others may see nothing very special in all those achievements. So the only opinion that really counts in the end is whether one is happy with one's own achievements. Well, so far, I am very happy of what's I've achieved up to now. But let's see if I can go any further.Corneliushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08049388322332876859noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8760307254603261893.post-59258020283311556582012-12-24T19:56:28.814+08:002012-12-24T19:56:28.814+08:00Hey Cornelius
Psychologically this is actually a ...Hey Cornelius<br /><br />Psychologically this is actually a defense mechanism to protect our own ego. Don't get me wrong: ego is not a bad thing. Technically it's how we balance between the primitive needs (greed, lust, etc.) and our moral obligations, which in turn presented as our very own ego.<br /><br />Rationalising and justifying is actually a defense mechanism, be it consciously or subconsciously, to protect our ego from being challenged. In this case, the expectations from one's peers might cause one to issue a 'disclaimer': by issuing such statements, in the case he/she can't perform as expected, at least he/she will have a 'valid reason' for the slip-up.<br /><br />Personally not only I use this for running; I use it partly as a psychological tactic. Issuing such 'disclaimer' would lower one's expectations. So if I fumbled, I performed 'as I expected'. But if I do excel, then it's way better than it appears to.<br /><br />But most of the time I'll still include some self-degradatory remark, so people won't think that I'm being ignorant or arrogant, like: "I <i>memang</i> slow all these while."<br /><br />In conclusion, it's the <i>kiasu-ness</i> and our fear of being humiliated. :)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07069537341409131668noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8760307254603261893.post-13057953783472845282012-12-23T10:11:26.663+08:002012-12-23T10:11:26.663+08:00Usually I think up of my safety nets halfway thru ...Usually I think up of my safety nets halfway thru the race. Or when my mojo just doesn't come at km5.<br /><br />And I'm pretty good at this, save some that I've overused haha.<br /><br />But the reason why have safety nets? Because I'm always trying to meet people's expectations. Not too much about unpreparedness for me. I always get to the starting line all gungho haha<br /><br />Last week I ran Malakoff and while doing the last hill, I was at pace with a runner who was pretty much struggling. I threw my safety net (without being asked)...saying it was just a fun run for me and didn't matter much...<br /><br />She replied, "this is my first race, so I'll just try my best"<br /><br />Reminder: sometimes our safety nets may affect people. I'll use it sparinglyKhadeeja Shahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07361658312224480936noreply@blogger.com